Learning to Trust Yourself

Learning to trust yourself can be quite the obstacle to overcome in life. Some people have no issues with this at all but on the flip side, many struggle making decisions and being at peace in knowing the right decision was made.

There are many outside influences that can have dramatic effects on how you feel before, during and after making big life decisions. The first thing to realize is that you matter and what you want from your life does too. You need to seriously assess where you are in your life, where you want to go, what responsibilities you currently are obligated to and then all of the other details associated with it. One other thing to consider is how your decision will perhaps affect others in your life.

For example, my life has been filled with wanting to always please other people and most times, never putting myself first. When I made the decision to move to Costa Rica from the United States in August 2017, I knew in my heart of hearts it was the right thing to do for me. I had limited responsibilities in my life during this time but I also knew deciding to move would impact my family and my dogs. I was being pulled by the Universe to make this move, to trust myself, to trust in the process and the guidance I was receiving, even if it meant my heart was being broken because I knew I had to give guardianship of my two dogs to my ex-husband. It was now his turn and time to care for them during their precious senior years. Not only that, but also knowing I would be saying, ‘See you soon’ to my very beloved family and friends immediately brought tears to my eyes.

Will you have naysayers? Yes, you will. There is no way around it. When you begin to hear the negative chatter surrounding the decision you made, you can rest assured that most people saying things to you have your best interest at heart. Whatever reason it is that they feel compelled to share their opinion, you WILL hear their voices in your head, you WILL question yourself, you WILL doubt. Rest assured, this is where learning to trust yourself and standing in your power of your decision will keep you grounded so you can continue to move forward along your chosen path.

This is your life. No one will ever have the exact same experiences that you have living your life and being your true authentic self. Don’t live your life being in the passenger seat while allowing someone else to drive for you. You’re not going to be on your death bed regretting all the things you did but you will be on your death bed regretting all of those experiences you did not do. Don’t have regret. Don’t live in fear. You only have one lifetime. Learning to trust in yourself is what will make your life such an amazing experience for you. Lay on your death bed with a huge grin on your face knowing you lived your life for you; knowing you enjoyed the ride and experiences; knowing you made a difference; knowing you loved hard; knowing you trusted yourself.

‘I Believe My Future is Bigger Than My Past’

I do believe my future is bigger than my past.  As soon as I heard these words spoken by Steve Gleason in his documentary titled, Gleason, it struck a chord within me. There are so many times in life when we are so hyper-focused upon the mistakes we have made.  We focus upon our failed relationships, our lost opportunities and the should’ves, could’ves, would’ves.

Little do most people know that those moments in life when we feel our failures will completely ruin us, they can actually be blessings in disguise.  Did you ever stop to think that maybe a relationship failed because growth was completed by both people involved and a better, healthier relationship was waiting for each?  Each person experienced what they needed to in the relationship and now it was time to move on.  Or perhaps a lost opportunity was a door closing and even though it was horrendous to experience and go through, little did you know an amazing and more fulfilling opportunity was just around the corner.

It’s okay to live in the past for the sake of recognizing the lesson each situation you’ve experienced has provided for you and even to be grateful for those lessons. It’s why you’ve had those experiences, although at the time, when you’re going through it, it is the last thing you’re thinking about. The moments when you’re in it so deeply, you don’t even know what the light looks like at the end of the tunnel as you dig your way out of the darkness. You see, that’s the thing…that darn light.  In the moments of rock bottom, just see it, envision that light.  Even if the light that shines through for you is simply the size of a pinhole, at least it is there.  Truth?  It’s always been there because it resides within you. Once you begin to realize this, it makes putting one foot in front of the other a bit easier.

I believe my future is bigger than my past because I refuse to allow my past to define the direction of where I want to go in my life, who I want to have along for the journey, and the opportunities I have yet to experience.  Society tells us that you have to have your successes accomplished within a specific age range and I just don’t agree with that.  There is still much love to give and to receive, there is much that has yet to be accomplished, there is much to see, there is a lot of life to be lived and yes, there are even more lessons to be learned.

What we do need to take away from our past is what we have learned and to recognize the growth that has occurred. Use those lessons to be more aware of the actions you take moving forward so you’re able to make the right decisions for yourself to enjoy deeper, more fulfilling experiences.

Time to Lay it Down

Few really truly know me. Even less actually ‘get’ me.  And by getting me, I mean know the true essence of who I am, what I stand for, what I believe in…what makes me tick…on the soul level.

Perhaps I have not let many in to be able to fully reveal myself. I’m aware that I do this as a defense mechanism for fear of being judged, not accepted or approved of. I’ve struggled with this my entire life.

Throughout my life I’ve been a people pleaser; always seeking to make others happy so they are not disappointed in me.  This behavior occurred in my relationships ranging from family to friends to my ‘romantic’ relationships. I’ve recognized this pattern of behavior within myself a few years ago.  I’m aware of it, yet at times it still rears it’s ugly head to challenge me to break the pattern. I no longer want to care what others think of my choices, decisions, my way of thinking, my spiritual beliefs. I no longer want to care what others think of me.  I am no longer seeking approval for the choices and decisions I make for myself.  I always respect the opinions of others, however my feeling is if someone does not agree with something I say, do or feel, that is on them, that is not on me.  It is no longer a burden of responsibility that I am willing to carry as it has gotten too heavy to bear and I am laying it down.

I am a deeply sensitive being. Like a badge of honor, I wear my emotions on my sleeve for the world to see.  I not only feel what I feel, most times, I also feel what you feel. My heart overflows with a sense of responsibility to care for many; to be the Light that shines in your moment of darkness.  Yet, at times, I too seek to find that Light in my moments of darkness.

Behind the closed doors in the sacred sanctuary of my apartment I cry with you, I smile with you, I hurt with you and I laugh with you. Tears are shed…a release. Releasing the emotions that I feel, is such a good, healthy thing to do because I simply don’t want them to get rooted within me. Many do not understand this and many never will.

I am a positive, kind person who does my best to see the good in people and situations.  Having a positive perspective on life can be difficult at times as I am human, just like you.  I have my own dragons to slay and some just don’t understand this. I share my outlooks with others in hopes it will help them for a moment in their day and perhaps they will, in turn, pay it forward.  It only has to begin with one person.  My perspective is, if I help one person, animal, etc, it will have a ripple effect and the gesture is much grander in the big picture then in the actual moment.

The journey I have been on since I moved to North Carolina has not been easy.  It has been an introspective map leading me to have met the most beautiful people, experience amazing moments, and it has allowed me to find out who I am and what I want from my life. Now at forty-four years young, I am beginning to understand who I really am and what my soul’s purpose is.

As I move forward, one foot in front of the other, I grow into the human that I was meant to become in this lifetime. Not everyone will understand and that is okay.  At times, I don’t even understand and in those moments I pause, take a deep breath, ask for Guidance, trust and continue with my journey.

 

The Story of Milo

Along with my messages and my own thoughts, I am feeling it is time to tell Milo’s story and how he has changed me forever. I will be posting his journey, more specifically his journey with cancer so that I may share my love for him, his love for me and my love for you allowing me to pass along the information I have learned when you hear those awful and dreaded words…’Your dog has cancer.’ It is my hopes that I will be able to help those dog parents who just don’t know what to do.

This is Milo’s story.

Milo and Boris were always thick as thieves.  Especially as younger pups.  They would always play and frolic together as well as snuggle together when resting.  They have always gone together like peas and carrots, peanut butter and jelly…salt and pepper. I can honestly say I cannot fathom my life without both of them physically in it.  And I know that will be a reality in my not too distant future.

Coming to this truth has not been easy for me.  In fact, a part of me still wishes the three of us will all die together in this life (at the same time).  Not one before the other, before the other.

I know we as humans have such a difficult time with the death of a loved one.  I know Milo will be with me forever, even in Spirit, but at times, it is hard to accept.

It still doesn’t make it any easier as I’m strolling down memory lane. Milo and Boris would get into everything together.  Milo would be the brains of the operation while Boris would be the distractor.

So when I would come home and there would be ‘stuff’ strewn all over my floor from Milo counter surfing, Boris would OVERLY greet me with JOYOUS cries of relief that I was home.  That would be until I found the mess…but Boris would carry on even louder at that point all the while ‘protecting’ his brother.

As younger dogs they would wrestle like crazy mad!  At first it would scare the daylights out of me as it sounded like there was a serious fight going on…but there wasn’t.  Just two dogs playing like dogs.

They played this way for a very long time.  It wasn’t until a little less than two years ago we noticed a difference in the play.  Milo just did not want to any longer. Boris would playfully attack him and Milo just sits.  I personally feel it is just Milo can’t handle Boris jumping on him any more.  It breaks my heart because I will always remember them as two young, vivacious creatures full of life and energy.  And now we’ve practically come full circle.  My heart is full of love because I am the blessed one having them in my life.

Please enjoy more photos:

A Message for All

The world is in challenging times. SO much is going on that appears to be real yet it is all an illusion and all are players in the big game. We are coming together more to assist the Lightworkers to harmoniously raise the vibration of each other and the planet. In times of strife, don’t fear we are always with you. Know you are loved, child.

Your life is not a mistake and everything falls together like a glorious puzzle each piece fitting intricately together in glorious perfection.

Lighten up and have fun.

 

The Story of Milo

Along with my messages and my own thoughts, I am feeling it is time to tell Milo’s story and how he has changed me forever.  I will be posting his journey, more specifically his journey with cancer so that I may share my love for him, his love for me and my love for you allowing me to pass along the information I have learned when you hear those awful and dreaded words…’Your dog has cancer.’  It is my hopes that I will be able to help those dog parents who just don’t know what to do.

This is Milo’s story.

Three months into our newly adopted status, I was beginning to think we had made a grave error in adopting Milo.  I’ve never had the experience of being the guardian for a true hound dog and was in unchartered territory.  This dog was a nut job.  Truly.

Then I had the lightbulb moment.

He was adopted by someone before we adopted him and then returned.  When I called to find out the reason(s) Milo was returned, I was told it was for behavior issues.  Okay, this made sense to me.  Clearly, the person who adopted him was in the same boat I was finding myself in.  But I was different.  I was going to take the time it was needed to help Milo with his behavior and allow Milo to truly shine as the amazing creature he is.  He just needed a chance and I was not going to give up on him as someone else did.

So we took classes with professionals and practiced…a lot!  I trained him on my own as well, teaching him amazing tricks because this one…oh my, THIS one was smart.  Incredibly smart.

His hound-ness embodied his essence and his nose to ground tracking abilities were astonishing to be witness to. For when he got on a scent, he was in heaven doing exactly what he his breed was born to do.  Track and hunt.

There were moments we would look at Milo as he was lounging and note that he belonged on the cover of Fox and Hound Magazine.  He is such a magnificent creature to watch.  His musculature, his stature, his charisma, his humor, his personality, his knowing, his loving will never in a million years be matched by another.

Milo is truly an angel sent to me by God.  It wasn’t until recent events transpired that I really, REALLY understood what this all meant.  With one look of his eyes into mine, I see the depth of a soul so wise and so knowing.  With one look of his eyes into mine, I hear the questions he is asking of me.  With one look of his eyes into mine, I feel his unconditional, pure love for me…just as I have for him.

With one look of his eyes into mine, I am home.

A Message for All

Your life’s lesson is boundaries. It will come in different forms and packages. Use your discernment to recognize the lesson and do not be so quick to just let anyone in. Speak your truth about your feelings. Do so in a kind and gentle way as others are learning from you too.

Where there is oneness the heart is open. You are not separate but at times you think you are.  That is the ego. Release and forgive. Heal from the lessons in your past so you can easily move forward along your path. The path toward enlightenment. Rest assured you have all that you need within you. Don’t be so quick to seek, seek, seek when the answers are in your heart. Connect to your heart every single day and the only person you shall seek is yourself.

Trust what you are getting, for it is real. Release doubt and self-judgement. Purpose, purpose, purpose…be purposeful. And dare to dream. No one can put out the light that is in your heart, Dear One. In fact, they are all drawn to it. A moth to the flame.

Be still, be silent and listen.

As so it is.

With Love, the World is Yours

With love, the world is yours. Present yourself with an open heart and an open mind. Do not be afraid of showing the world who you really are. For you are a Divine Being of love and light. You are here to help the planet, as we all are. Cast your blessings and prayers each and every day to the world and help lift the vibration of the planet. Say it to every human, every plant, every insect and every animal.  Raise the frequency of YOU and therefore the world’s frequency will rise. Do not think you are just one person for one person can make a difference and collectively alter the vibration.

 

Many of us wish to help and we do, however do not forget to ask us to help as well.  We do not intervene unless we are asked. In a world of limitless possibilities, be the one always moving forward on your path. Go forth with conviction and purpose as you are so loved.

I Am Enough, I Am Always Enough.

There is a light that shines in the center of your Being that needs to be shining brighter. Open your heart center to new, loving experiences and new loving people. Watch who you so freely shine your heart light for not everyone is as open as you. They will take a piece of your light.  Have discernment for who you bring into your precious world, space and hearts.

You are a beacon of light for the world.  Connect your light with the light of the world and together darkness will be uprooted. Where there is darkness there can always be light.

Take heed of others and follow your guidance system. Love is the only way. Love is the only way.  Forgive and love.

Desire peace of mind, peace of heart and peace of the world.

Don’t look to the mirror for your reflection as your true reflection shines through your heart. That is who you really are. Share your reflection with the world.

And so it is.

Today’s Goddess Message

I decided it would be fun to ask for a general message for the those reading this post from The Goddess Oracle deck by Amy Sophia Marashinsky and Illustrated by Hrana Janto.

Each and every one of us, whether born male or female in this lifetime possess BOTH male and female energy.  The ying and the yang.  So yes, if you’re male, you do possess energies of the Divine Feminine/Goddess.

Today’s card is Goddess Vila: Shape-Shifting.

I dance from form to form

I shift from shape to shape

ever changing

ever expanding

ever becoming

I am flexibility

for by changing my form

I freely flow with all that comes my way

I am consciousness

for by shifting my shape

I gain an expanded awareness of what it is to Be

I waltz a whirlwind

tango a tree

salsa a swan

or just plain fox-trot

My dance is an affinity with All

for I am able to become All in order to know All

Becoming All dissolves form

Knowing All creates Oneness

The illusion is that you have a separate shape.

Continue below for meaning of the card…

Meaning:

Vila has come dancing into your life in her many forms to teach you to nourish wholeness by learning to shape-shift. Have you been too long in one form? Are you feeling still and stagnant, losing flexibility in your way of thinking and being? O perhaps you feel that the human is the most important being in creation – that the rocks, tress, animals, earth, etc, are lesser forms.  It is time to expand your awareness, to enhance your flexibility by gaining the perspective of other forms. Vila says the way to wholeness lies in experiencing the whole of creation.